Moments, like the one that happened last night, are just so freaking heart breaking. You are left speechless. You have no idea what to say, but know that you need to say something.
Last night, the kids, Eli, and I were all sitting down at the dinner table eating as a family (like we always do) and we were all talking. The kids were already bathed and just needed to eat. Something was said along the lines of needing to hurry so we could cuddle and that is when Seth asked, "We get to sleep here tonight?" He had the biggest smile on his face. I said, "No sweetie, tonight you have to go to your mom's." And then...
"But I just want to stay here with you guys." ...and a total sad look on his face, close to tears.
This is something that has been happening more and more. And it isn't just coming from him, but Swae as well. It is so sad. I had to pause and then I told him that tonight he would be with his mom and then we would pick him up and he gets to be with us all weekend. This used to make it better, but it isn't working as well anymore. In fact, Swae is starting to ask more and more questions. The latest being, "Why can't we stay with you and daddy and you guys take us to daycare or school in the morning?"
It just kills me. They aren't stupid and with Swae getting older, she is becoming more and more smart and vocal about things. I love those little ones so very much and hate to see the look on their face when we have to tell them they aren't staying with us. And I know it hurts Eli - although it makes him feel good to know that they want to be with him more. They ask all the time for us to call their mom to see if they can stay. We have done this a few times, only to be told no, so we don't even try anymore. How sad is that? They can stay other places, but not with their own dad. It is just truly unfair and I am so tired of seeing the kids being the ones that hurt.
9 comments:
So sad. It is going to get worse when the baby gets here. They aren't going to want to be away from their sibling and may not understand why their sibling gets to stay with you 2 every night.
I know, that really scares me as well. I can only hope that circumstances are different than they are now and may help. If not, we will definitely have to spend a lot of time doing whatever we can to help them with that. It seriously kills me.
My heart aches for those kids. And for you and Eli.
Sad. I hate when things that can make us happy also can be sad as well. As least they have a wonderful home with you.
So sad.
awww ...so sad.
Very sad Steph. Too bad he couldn't get more time in his custody agreement.
Yes, so sad for their poor, actual mother. I wonder how it will be when her kids admit to her that they don't love her at all and they want their new mother, an ex friend of hers! And, so, so sad that she won custody! I'm sure that was purely accidental!
Oh man this is the hard part. I think if the parents live in the same town then something can be worked out. I do every other week with my son and he does really well. Just keep hugging them lots, the mom will get it.
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