Wow...that is pretty much how I am feeling right now. I can't even come up with other words to describe exactly how I feel. I will try to explain and give the short version. Back when I started working at the University, I met a great person and became really good friends with him. There was never anything between us other than friendship. He always listened to all my guy problems and I always listened to his girl problems. Like him, I would always get so upset about how his girlfriend treated him and always wanted nothing but happiness for him. He was someone who I talked to every day at work and told pretty much anything to because he never judged me and was genuine. He ended up marrying the girl he was dating and that never really seemed to make their issues any better (like I told him it wouldn't...but whatever). A little over a year ago, they went through a really bad time. They even separated. During this time, I was who he turned to. I was who he talked with, cried to, hung out with, you name it. I felt bad for all he was going through and just tried to do what I could for him and be the best friend that I could be.
Well, after a month or two of him and his wife fighting or whatever, she showed up and flipped out on him and then some how everything was ok with them. I was happy for him knowing that divorce wasn't really what he wanted. But somehow, our friendship turned...bad. I don't really know what happened or how it got to that point, but all I know is that it was bad. A lot of mean things were said (especially on my end). And since that day, about a year ago, we haven't spoken. In fact, we haven't even seen each other. When I came back to the University I found out he was going through the academy and no longer worked here, his marriage was great, and they are expecting a baby girl. I was happy to hear that things were good for him, but I always missed my friend.
Today his dad came in the office (he is one of the supervisors in my department) and a lady in the office asked how his son was doing. It is hard not to hear what is being said when they are only 10 feet away and so I listened to the whole scoop of him quitting the academy because he wants more of a family life than what he would have. Also, that he started back at work for the University today. I was just shocked and couldn't help wondering when I would be seeing him them...and curious as to how things would be due to how bad things were left between the two of us. I knew I would be seeing him sooner than later because I work in the same building as his dad...I just didn't think that seeing him would be five minutes after listening to all that was going on.
That's right, he walked in and before I saw him, I heard his voice saying, "Hi Steph." I couldn't even think of what to do or how to react...I just had to react. So I said hi and smiled and we talked about him being back and needing keys and whatnot. You could tell that he was just as nervous as I was and that there was stuff that both wanted to say, but we skated around it. I asked about his little girl on the way and when she is due and a name and all that. Because knowing him, he is a proud daddy already and will be a great father. And I know he was genuine when he looked at me and asked how I was doing. A few minutes later there was a small silence and we both just looked at each other and for once I let my pride go and said, "I hate how things turned about between us." That was the best thing I could've done for the both of us. He told me to come give him a hug and as he sat and held me we both said how much we missed the other and how sorry we were. It was just nice to let it go after so long, good to see him, and better to know that a simple, single hug made it all better...even if we aren't as close as we were.
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