It is starting to be said that I am a busy bee. That's right, me. I guess I am always unavailable. How could this be you ask? Let's see. I work for the state at the Division of Child and Family Services, I am not serving and hostessing up at The Lodge at Galena, and I coach volleyball. And when I am not doing that, I am trying to please my mother by hanging out at her house and keeping up a social life. Lately, I have found myself going out on Saturday nights. This just makes me not home more and more. Not to mention, I try to keep up with seeing my friends (you included Shannon!!).
I don't know what it is. I feel like if I am not busy, then I am being lazy. And at this point in my life, I am trying to do all the things that I have wanted to do while I am still single, unmarried, and kid-less. Serving has always been something that I wanted to try, but have always been too shy to do it...I know, doesn't seem like it is possible, but it's true. So, I tried it and I absolutely love it. Yes, it is nerve racking at times, but it is fun. It makes for really long days when I am going straight from work to work, but I should benefit from it in the end I think. Volleyball is rewarding to me. I love working with the girls and knowing that I am making a difference in their lives. It makes me feel good. And work is just work. I have to work to pay the bills and I would get bored if I didn't.
I am not a huge fan of going out and partying. I don't like seeing the same people over and over and I seriously got sick of going to the same places. I went to 210 not knowing what to expect and really like the atmosphere there. It is crazy. That place is nuts until all hours of the morning. I don't like spending the money and I hate waking up feeling like shit the next day. But I have been going out with my friends the last couple weekends. I guess more than anything it just gives me something to do and I am able to meet new people. And by people, I just mean friends cause I am not a big fan of meeting and dating guys that I meet in a bar. Plus, my heart just isn't in it.
But because I am so busy, I feel like I am neglecting my friends. I feel that I let people down every week. I feel bad about it too. It's like there needs to be more hours in the day or more days in the week. Something. I love hanging out with my friends and doing things with them. Now I just have to find the time for it and them.
1 comment:
YOUR NOT NEGLECTING US YOUR JUST DOING WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. BUT I DO THINK YOU ARE TRYING TO HIDE FROM SOEMETHING (I.E. A CERTAIN GUY) I THINK THAT AS SOON AS YOU MAN UP AND EMAIL HIM AND BEAUTIFUL THINGS START HAPPENING WITH YOU, THINGS WILL FIND A MUCH BETTER BALANCE. BUT WHAT I REALLY THINK IS THAT ITS NOT THAT YOU FEEL LAZY IF YOU AREN'T DOING SOMETHING, ITS THAT THEN YOU REALLY HAVE TO BE ALONE WITH YOUR THOUGHTS AND THAT IS POSSIBLY THE SCARIEST OF ALL PLACES TO BE. SO SOON WHEN YOUR THOUGHTS ARE ALL HAPPY AND YOU AND MR SOMEONE WORK IT ALL OUT THEN MAYBE YOU WILL FINALLY BE HAPPY TO BE ALONE WITH YOUR THOUGHTS, AND THEN WHEN YOU ARE READY TO BE YOU WON'T BE ALONE ANYMORE BECAUSE YOU WILL FINALLY HAVE THAT SOMEONE YOU WERE LOOKING FOR. YOU BETTER EMAIL HIM SOON OR ELSE.
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