House Hunting

Last Saturday I went house hunting. That's right, I am currently on a mission to find the perfect house for me to buy. I am super excited, but I am nervous at the same time. I don't want to make the wrong move and don't want to settle on something and then not like it after I do it. Most of all, I am just stoked that I am going to be buying something. It is something that I have been wanting to do for so long and am finally in a position that I am able to move forward. Such a great feeling!

So we went around and looked at a lot of new homes that are being built in Double Diamond and Curti Ranch and let me tell you there is so many to chose from. It is hard to keep them all straight. And the prices...they are good, but still so expensive. There is a new development going in called Brittany Meadows. They are priced really low, but there is only one floor plan that I like. So that is definitely a good option. The other ones I really liked were the Lennar homes in Curti Ranch. Super, super cute homes!!!!!!!!!!! They are good priced too right now, but the next phase they are going up. The good things with these homes are that there are some upgrades (like granite counter tops) included. I still have a ton of homework to do on these before any decision is made, but I am glad I am actually getting a chance to look and start the process.

This coming weekend I am going to go and look at homes that are a couple years old. Shannon is awesome and looked up homes and there are some really cute ones. I am really excited to go and look at them. They already have yards and from the pictures look like they have really been taken care of. I just can't wait to actually see them in person.

The whole thing is overwhelming. Not to mention, I don't like being patient. So when I see something that I like, I want it now. There is no waiting or being rational and realistic. Good thing my mom is there to keep me straight! I can't wait to have something like that, that is mine. It is going to be such an awesome feeling. I want it now, but I know that time is everything and I just need to make sure I find something that is perfect for me. So happy hunting to me! =)

A Turn Around

So my roommate has been back for over a week and I am actually impressed with how things are going. Yes, she makes noise and yes she still leaves dishes in the sink, but she is actually making efforts. I don't get the hole leave shit in the sink when the dishwasher is right there and empty, but whatever. I came home last night after work and she was in class and found that she had bought more toilet paper, cleaned out the refrigerator, and gotten us a bottle of wine. It was so nice to know that she was actually doing something and helping out.

Oh and another great thing. She has paid me all of rent through May. That means that I don't have to worry about not getting a check from her. I just have to rely on myself. And she is planning on paying me for cable through May as well. I think that some of our issues weren't just her, but me as well. Since I was so used to being alone, any little noise bothered me and would wake me up since I was after all not used to any noise other than me. More than anything, I just stopped letting her bother me and letting things get to me. It is nice to have someone around. Not to mention, I am really not home that much and have other places I can go if I need to get away. AND...she is helping pay and that means less I have to pay. Always a nice thing.

So cuddos to her!

Done with my job

Alright, so I am about to go insane. I am sitting here at a job that sucks ass and that I hate being at and not sure what to do. At this point, all I want to do is tell them to fuck off and give my two weeks notice and be done. But then I have to be realistic and remember that I have bills to pay and that I have insurance and benefits to think about. I was looking online about jobs that I can apply for and let me tell you that jobs with the state are awful slim. It usually isn't until around July that more jobs open up. So I just feel so stuck and lost and so unsure of what to do.

I have been checking the state job website every day. I have applied for two jobs and I was approved for one. Nothing to get too excited about though. The state is so weird. Now that I am approved, I get put on a list and then when the department is able to hire, they pull the list, then go through the interview process and then decide to give a job to someone. It is all lengthy and annoying. I could possibly have something going for me though since I worked in the department that I applied for the last two weeks and when I told the supervisor over there that I applied and everything, she asked for a copy of my application. Don't know what that means though and still don't know if they are hiring. There are just so few jobs that are even appealing right now.

I shouldn't feel bad though. I am not the only one at work that is having a hard time. There are so many people in our office right now that are unhappy. Things are just changing so much so quick. They let things go for so long and now are just pulling the reins and people don't know what to think. Personally, I think a lot of things are getting out of hand. The higher ups are even going as far as to get it to where we can't wear jeans on Fridays. That is just so annoying to me. And how is it that I sit behind a desk for 8 hours a day but still have to wear nice slacks and whatnot. Seriously, who flippin cares. I don't do shit really.

Pretty much today is just a shitty day at work and I am over it and seriously praying that another job comes to me very soon!

This one is for you Shannon!

I just have to say that I am so excited that I proved you wrong last night!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!! You didn't think I would show up and sure enough, you got the knock on your door even without me being able to get ahold of you. So ya, that was awesome!!

Oh and thank you for being such a great friend and listening to me about my eventful dinner. I love the way that you look at things and things that you point out. You are awesome and I love you!

I love...

My family - without them I would be so lost. They have helped me in so many ways and they are still there for me no matter what. I love spending time with them. Don't get me wrong, we have our down times too, but for the most part they are my rock.

My best friends - Kara and Tara are amazing and have been there for me for years. I love them like they were the sisters I got to pick and wouldn't know what to do without them. We have experienced so much together and are constantly changing but always making the friendship last and stronger.

Friends - I have a couple newer friends in my life that have added so much (Shannon and Wabby). I love talking to them and hanging out with them. I know that I don't spend as much time with them as I would like or even they would like, but I am really trying and working on it. They have become people that I actually like to turn to. I love their advice and just knowing they are there to count on.

My puppy - he is the cutest little thing ever and such a lover. There is nothing better than having a bad day and knowing you can grab him and he is there to just love and cuddle with you. The best is sleeping with him...he loves to be under the covers and cuddled right next to you.

Diet Soda - cause then I get a sweet taste with no calories. I am learning to love water more and more, which is crazy because I used to refuse to drink it.

Eating Healthy - it makes me happy knowing that I am doing something good for me and knowing it is going to benefit me in the long run. Now, I just need to work out regularly because exercise is good for you.

Things that make me smile and laugh - I love to be happy.

The new Sketchers I got last night for $20 on sale.

Jeans!!! Speaking of, I need to get more...

I probably love a lot more things, but that is a good list for now.

Missing piece of the puzzle

Do you ever feel like stuff is happening around you and it doesn't make sense? Like there is a piece of the puzzle missing but you had no idea a puzzle was even being formed? That is how I feel right now. M.L. is completely out of his mind and somehow thinks he knows so much about my life and that I am doing something that we need to "talk" about...even though he is off doing his own thing. What it seems like to me is that he is getting information about me from someone. But I have no flippin idea who it could be from. And the information that he is getting seems like it is trying to make me look bad. Mostly, this just makes me feel like I am back in high school dealing with this bullshit. I don't know. Somehow he always knows what I am doing and who I am with. None of my friends talk to him. None of them no his number, so how could this be possible!?

So now I feel like I need to find this missing piece of some puzzle and I have no idea where to start. It is driving me crazy. Then there is a part of me that is just tempted to be like, "fuck it" because I really don't need to deal with any of it anyway. Mostly all his accusations seem to stem from jealousy which I find amusing because he has no reason to be jealous. So ya, that is my mystery as of now.

I'm back....

Goodness, it seems like forever since I have last gotten a chance to post something. It actually has been almost 3 weeks and that is just much too long. The last two weeks I was working at a different office and had limited access to the Internet. Talk about feeling like I was cut off from so much of the world and not knowing what is going on. I am always online usually while I am at work due to email and not even having that was so weird. Let's just say, it is nice to be back!! But I really did enjoy the time at the other office. It was nice doing other stuff and being around other people. I loved the lady I was working for and I really got a long well with all the other workers. It did make it nice to be able to look at a hot guy all day, but that is besides the point! :) I wouldn't mind working there full time, I just don't know if there are any openings.

I wouldn't say that not too much is going on that is new in my life. My roommate is back for semester. I don't know how happy I am about that. She was going to move out, but then said she decided to stay. I am happy knowing she is still helping pay, but don't know if I really am excited knowing that my sleep gets interrupted...like last night. She just is so odd. She bangs stuff around and even when she says she is trying to be quiet, is louder than anyone else I have ever known. Whatever though. I am no there much, she is only here for semester, then back to Hawaii for summer.

Oh there is something new. I have to find a new job. That's right. I am officially not happy where I am at and after being told that I am not going to be able to move up (even though that was what I was told originally), it is time to move on. I just don't know what to do. I want to stay with the state, but the jobs with the state or so limited. I just feel kind of lost and not sure what to do. And, I am not feeling good. That is really all that is new with me.

Welcome 2007

Wow, was I ever lame bringing in the new year. I started off New Year's Eve with working at 8:30am. I worked my shift left and within an hour was asked to come back to work to work the dinner schedule. I figured I would still be out early enough that I could go do something and was excited to make a little extra money, so I went back. What a horrible idea that ended up being. Not only did I really not make that much in tips because most of my tables just sat there when they were done eating not allowing me to get other people and more tips, but my back started hurting. This happens occasionally since I was in an accident a couple years ago, but for some reason, that night was really, really bad. It was so bad that I was uncomfortable and found it extremely hard to keep a smile on my face. When I would go back in the kitchen, my eyes would tear up and one of our cooks would rub it. By the end of my shift, it was so bad, I left work crying. I went to my parents where I loaded up on a muscle relaxer and a bunch of anti-inflammatorys and just hung out there. Everyone that I know for the most part was out partying it up and I was home on the couch with my parents. Oh well. I guess you have to have a year like that at some point. Needless to say, it was nice not being hungover when I woke up on New Year's day and I got some really good sleep.

I have spent a ton of time trying to come up with New Year's Resolutions and I really wasn't coming up with anything. I think I finally came up with a couple that are pretty realistic and that I could stick with. One is saving money. That should be simple enough since I am working so flippin much. Another is to eat healthy and maintain a healthy weight. No, I am not fat, not over weight or anything of the sort and I know that. I just know where I would like to be and how I would like to feel and that is what I plan on doing. Shannon got me hooked on this website that should get me to where I want to be and she right now is my motivation and inspiration. I think having someone to do it with will be that much more enjoyable. Now I just need to get on the band wagon of working out at least three times a week. I don't think that is too much and I should be able to fit that in between both jobs and volleyball. So those are my goals. I guess one other and one that I started before the new year is to be an overall better person. I only want people in my life that are going to be positive. I am over drama and negative people and don't need it in my life. I am not in high school and I am sure as hell not going to put up with a bunch of bullshit. I plan on being a better friend, daughter, sister and so on. Those are my goals.